The friend zone is a fairytale Invented to relieve people of the pressure of rejecting others while misguiding others to the idea that rejection isn’t natural. I use the pronouns, people and others because anyone can be subjugated to the mythical land of friend zone, male or female but it’s usually men that talk about this. This is because when it comes to romance it’s usually the guy who is looked at to do virtually everything.
Some will disagree but it’s no secret that men do most of the first rounds of contact with women. Men are expected to lead, be confident, be polite and courteous while at the same time upholding impervious strong mind, body and soul. To fail in either of these things gives society an excuse to deem him less masculine.
Women on the other hand are expected to wait to be approached. Be ladylike, submissive and less aggressive. In a world where gender roles are less prevalent a woman could walk up to a man and express her desires without being seen as less feminine. But our society was practically built on these unwritten rules so both genders are too engulfed in these beliefs to ever think about anything outside the norm.
So back to the guys. Since a man is supposed to be so flawless it’s expected that if he makes the right moves with ANY woman(married, lesbian, not attracted to him, basically any valid excuse to turn someone down) he will win her over and have his way with her. Any form of rejection is strictly on him and the glitches in his matrix must be fixed if he wants to succeed with the opposite sex. Here comes the friend zone and the case of the nice guy.
Legend tells of a noble man of great character and noble causes. He opened doors for women, treated them with the utmost respect and made them feel important. He was a gentle spirit with mighty power. Anyone who harmed his lady was met with forces unimaginable. But the lady saw this man as too kind and unworthy of her hand. So she banished him to a land where he could never been perceived as a competent lover for all eternity. The friend zone.
This is seriously how some people think. It’s ridiculous. Rejection is part of the dating world. It’s part of life. There is no friend zone. I’ve never understood the term. If you like someone , express that to them and get to know them. Express your opinion of them in a reasonable way. Treat them out on a date. Show them respect and kindness. But don’t do it so much that you forget to flirt, and express romantic desires. Express that you are wanting to be their lover, not a friend, buddy or consultant, or “laughs” brother. If they turn you down move on to the next one. Rejection is part of life. There is no friend zone. You are not supposed to go through life hearing YES all of the time. Some people will reject you no matter what you do. I’ve approached over a thousand women and through my experience it doesn’t matter what you say or what you do(for the most part). It’s a chance. They either like you or they don’t. Five people might think you’re the crypt keeper while ten others will think you’re hot like the Fourth of July.
Basically stop the friend zone talk. Please. People say it like friendship is a bad thing now. Rejection is part of life and it’s not leaving any time soon. Now get out there and be somebody 😃.
It’s been about half a year since I last made a post. But I’m a writer, so inevitably I always end up on this blog. That’s mainly due to me releasing or in the process of publishing a novel. Earlier this year a friend inspired me to finish one of my favorite projects originally named, Love Bleeds Red but has now been rewritten as, Pretty Monsters.
The story is about a girl who was cursed by a demon two centuries before the story takes place. The curse gives her immortality in exchange for her humanity. She can never die but every living thing she encounters will fear and either run away or attack her. So for two hundred years she suffers loneliness, persecution and isolation. It seems her life will be an eternity of darkness until she meets a boy who for some reason is immune to the effects of her curse. He falls for her instantly and despite her strongest efforts she can’t seem to push him away so he can’t discover her dark secret. As she lets him in she has to keep him from getting hurt from the darkness inside of her.
This story has a lot of supernatural elements along with action and romance. I got inspiration from Harry Potter while writing the story over and over. I wanted it to have a magical and out of this world sort of feel to it. Then I added horrific elements to make it out to be a somewhat romantic and dark fairy tale. I tried to include a lot of mythical creatures (no spoilers) some already known and others I made on my own. Pretty Monsters has been requested over and over from people who either know me personally or have had a class with me and heard about the story. I’ve finished its final draft and now it’s in the revision and editing stage. I plan to release it on Halloween because what a better time to release a horror themed story on Halloween?
Aside from the story writing I’ve been up to quite a lot this year. I’m finishing up my final semester at Ivy Tech before I transfer to university. From there I plan to major in Journalism and pursue a career in reporting. I have thoughts about going back to school sometime later to become a detective. It all depends on where I’m at in life in about 4 years.
That’s it for my update. I felt like blogging today. It’s been on my mind for a while. I’ve been getting weekly views for some reason and can’t figure out from who or why. But it’s brought me back. I plan to start blogging every other day or weekly.
You came up in conversation the other day. Whenever I’m around you I feel weird because lately whenever I’m around you I notice how beautiful you are. It’s strange because I’ve never noticed. Not until recently anyway. The funny thing is you probably don’t have a clue that I would ever wonder about you when you’re not around. But yes. I wonder.
I wonder about how you’re doing. If you’re happy or sad. What if she’s depressed or something? You never look depressed. But I wonder sometimes. What if? And there’s no way I’d go out of my way to ask. Why? That should be obvious. You would wonder why I cared to ask. Then you would realize that I cared to ask. Then you would be wondering about a lot.
So instead of talking to you about this, I spoke to a friend. I told them about how I’ve known you for a while and that whenever I see you I notice you more and more. I’m usually pretty relaxed with the opposite sex. But with you it’s weird because I’ve known you for so long. Now all of the sudden you’re so, wow. When I talked to my friend about you I realized that I was talking about you. Damn. I like you.
Again. There’s no way you know this is about you. You don’t have a clue that I notice you. You probably think you’re the last person I’d think about. Wrong. Lately I wonder about you. The biggest wonder is how you would react. What would you feel if you knew I thought about you? My friend thinks you would react well. I don’t want to find out…right now.
So I’m writing about it on my blog. Even if you do read this there’s no way you’ll know it’s about you. You might get a hunch. But I’ll just lie and say it’s not about you if you ask. You’ll know it’s about you if I ever want you to know.
But in a nutshell, I think you’re pretty brilliant.
Loud beauty is your nature.
You don’t try to impress.
Yet you made this man a chaser.
By being yourself and nothing less.
I am not afraid to say out loud,
How beautiful you really are to me.
You shine like the brightest sun above a cloud.
You illuminate my darkness and set me free.
You and me are the dream team.
Being with you makes me feel unstoppable.
You shine this beautiful beam.
Thank you for your loveliness.
It feels me with such liveliness.
Written by. T. Edward Redd
Please put the coffee down.
When you breathe, I want to frown.
The odor makes me squirm,
Yet your beauty, makes me oh so warm.
I just wanted to share books.
Yet you’re foxing me with your good looks.
But I’m repulsed by horrid smells,
And I want to hammer my nose with nails.
I know a man who’s losing,
The light in his eyes.
His heart is bruising.
Pain eats away at his soul like flies.
Those dying eyes.
How they remind me of mine.
So long ago I tried, freeing my soul from dark cries.
But was saved by the great divine.
I was rejected by death.
I discarded my own life.
Yet was given one last breath.
Now I live with great strive.
How can I save his soul?
It’s like I’ve been sent back in time.
Placed here to console.
Stop him from listening, to familiar dark chimes.
I’m lost for action.
Though I avoided my self-inflicted demise.
It was only by a fraction.
Not my doing. But a gift from the skies.
Please don’t let go.
Though times are dark.
You must search for your inner glow.
Look in your heart and let light spark.