The friend zone is a fairytale Invented to relieve people of the pressure of rejecting others while misguiding others to the idea that rejection isn’t natural. I use the pronouns, people and others because anyone can be subjugated to the mythical land of friend zone, male or female but it’s usually men that talk about this. This is because when it comes to romance it’s usually the guy who is looked at to do virtually everything.
Some will disagree but it’s no secret that men do most of the first rounds of contact with women. Men are expected to lead, be confident, be polite and courteous while at the same time upholding impervious strong mind, body and soul. To fail in either of these things gives society an excuse to deem him less masculine.
Women on the other hand are expected to wait to be approached. Be ladylike, submissive and less aggressive. In a world where gender roles are less prevalent a woman could walk up to a man and express her desires without being seen as less feminine. But our society was practically built on these unwritten rules so both genders are too engulfed in these beliefs to ever think about anything outside the norm.
So back to the guys. Since a man is supposed to be so flawless it’s expected that if he makes the right moves with ANY woman(married, lesbian, not attracted to him, basically any valid excuse to turn someone down) he will win her over and have his way with her. Any form of rejection is strictly on him and the glitches in his matrix must be fixed if he wants to succeed with the opposite sex. Here comes the friend zone and the case of the nice guy.
Legend tells of a noble man of great character and noble causes. He opened doors for women, treated them with the utmost respect and made them feel important. He was a gentle spirit with mighty power. Anyone who harmed his lady was met with forces unimaginable. But the lady saw this man as too kind and unworthy of her hand. So she banished him to a land where he could never been perceived as a competent lover for all eternity. The friend zone.
This is seriously how some people think. It’s ridiculous. Rejection is part of the dating world. It’s part of life. There is no friend zone. I’ve never understood the term. If you like someone , express that to them and get to know them. Express your opinion of them in a reasonable way. Treat them out on a date. Show them respect and kindness. But don’t do it so much that you forget to flirt, and express romantic desires. Express that you are wanting to be their lover, not a friend, buddy or consultant, or “laughs” brother. If they turn you down move on to the next one. Rejection is part of life. There is no friend zone. You are not supposed to go through life hearing YES all of the time. Some people will reject you no matter what you do. I’ve approached over a thousand women and through my experience it doesn’t matter what you say or what you do(for the most part). It’s a chance. They either like you or they don’t. Five people might think you’re the crypt keeper while ten others will think you’re hot like the Fourth of July.
Basically stop the friend zone talk. Please. People say it like friendship is a bad thing now. Rejection is part of life and it’s not leaving any time soon. Now get out there and be somebody 😃.