My ultimate goal in life is to fully master that internal state of happiness.
I do this by doing the things I love and pursuing my dreams. I love writing stories, dating, meeting people and making them laugh, challenging myself and exploring the wonders of the world. My dreams in life are to become an author, share my stories and become a successful husband and father. That’s pretty much it.
A lot of people are surprised when they hear that last part; wife and kids. At the moment, I am single. But ultimately, I want those two things before I turn 30. I don’t want a family right at this moment because I know I’m not in any position to provide for children. I’m sure I could handle marriage but I won’t just marry any gal. That’s how divorces happen. Before I marry, I want to date a woman for a couple of years, get to know her and then pop the question. I want to take the time to learn about a woman and slowly bond/grow with her.
Most people I come across make the comment that I have my life figured out or “mapped” out as they say. Then they say they just go with the flow. I guess in a way I do have my life mapped out. I wanted to publish my first book before 21 and here I am 20, a week away from selling my first bundle of novels. I have a part time job at a diner and I’m in college to be an English major. I’m saving up to become financially independent by 22. I want the degree in English just in case novels don’t bring enough money to the table. Most people believe I’m in my mid to late 20’s before I tell them that I’m only 20.
I guess this map came from seeing many unhappy people as I grew up. “Stay a kid as long as you can,” they said. I saw divorced families, including my own as I grew up as well. I saw married couples who weren’t happy together, staying together because they had kids and not for love.
When I was younger, I knew I would eventually want a family. But as I got older I got a new goal. It was after my very first bad breakup. I was so depressed that I almost took my own life. It had hit me that I was unhappy, with myself. I sought happiness from others and when they were unable to give it to me, I felt miserable. After that breakup, my ultimate goal in life was to become happy, with me.
I read books, I meditated and I studied people who I perceived as “happy”. What was it? How was it obtained? I saw happy families and couples, and even singles that were just “happy”. Why? Were they rich? Did they have an awesome job? So I studied more and more. I even asked questions.
Happiness is a vague term. It has a different meaning to everyone. But these people all had something in common. They all weren’t rich, not all of them had cool jobs and some were even having tough times. But these people were all doing something they loved and had a belief in. Some were loving mothers who just enjoyed their kids. Others worked in some store but did something they loved like sell music Cd’s because they loved music or cook in a restaurant because they loved to cook.
Happiness to me is being content with where I am in life, challenging myself and achieving my dreams. I sat down and asked myself what I loved. What were my dreams? What made “me” happy?
…just to name a few things that give me a thrill.
I dream of being an author and a successful husband and father. I had already been writing stories before my realization. But at 18 when I realized happiness was my ultimate goal, I sought to make my dreams come true. Marriage is a long-term dream. It isn’t something I’m willing to jump into on impulse. I want a successful marriage and I also want to be a successful husband. So I work hard to become financially independent before I even think about taking care of someone else. This is why I’m going for a degree even though I’ve already published my first book.
I published my book first so I could already have my own personal success or at least working towards it, before deciding to share my life with a woman. I want to have my dream in my hands because that is my personal achievement. It’s my internal joy. I am finally an author and I intend to become a damn good one. I wanted to be the kind of man a woman could look up to and admire before I decided to date anyone seriously.
My life isn’t necessarily “mapped” out. I don’t have a physical map or chart (although I do budget and make money goals), I just know what I want and I’m willing to do what it takes to get it. I make sacrifices and choices based on the future outcome. Sometimes I take different routes but I try to stay on course. So far, my map works for me. It keeps me from getting lost.
At the present moment, I can honestly say that I am happy with myself. I’m even proud. April 1st, 2014 marks the day that I achieved one of my first big milestones. No one held my hand, no one did it for me and no one gave it to me. I have supporters but I did 95% of the work alone.
I guess my point of this overly long post is to say, “Do what makes you happy.” If you have a dream, go for it. Don’t let anyone tell you, you can’t or it’s silly. I used to feel a bit idiotic and in over my head for knowing what I want in life at age 18-20. People said I was too young, go have fun, blah blah blah.
But this works for me. This is “fun” and it makes me happy. The point of this poss is to say to you all, “Do what makes you happy.” Leave out all the rest. Do what it takes to reach your happiness.
Dream wild but don’t fall asleep. Shoot for the stars and take a risk.